2 Months to Go!

So today marks 2 months to my race. Wow. It still feels so far away, yet way too close. I have feelings of anticipation, fear, humility, excitement

Some days, I feel ready. This usually happens after a good run or swim. Maybe it's the endorphins, I don't know!?

Some days, I feel absolute panic. I am not going to be ready. What have I gotten myself into? It's so, so far.

When I am really tired, I make "deals" with myself. Ok, 2000 meters, and then, if you're tired, you can get out of the pool. Run for 20 minutes and turn around; if you feel good, run 30 minutes. Just get out on your bike...go get a coffee in Fairfax (30 miles). These "deals" get me out the door and then, I usually end up going farther since I feel pretty good when I am finally out. I think the huge motivator is that I don't want to be mid-race and think, I shouldn't have skipped those swim workouts or I was being a wimp when I didn't go the entire bike ride.

I also have come to realize the importance and power of positive self-talk. I probably sound like a quack. But it's amazing; if I keep telling myself something over and over, I start to believe it...."you feel fine, you feel fine. you're strong, you feel fine." Crazy, but it works. Maybe it's the depleted glycogen-stores in my body, and my brain not having enough "energy" to argue! And I just don't give myself another option. I will do something, not "if" or "maybe."

I have been wearing my Boston Red Sox hat on my brick runs (30 minute runs after a 5-6 hour bike; helps get legs used to the transition), pulling it really low on my head, over my eyes. And as crazy as it sounds, I feel like no one can "see" me (maybe it's because I can't really see them!), but I feel like it gives me more energy and a little "push" when I'm feeling terrible. The first 15 minutes are usually pretty painful since my legs have been used to cycling for so long. I know, it sounds completely bizarre...that I think this hat is somehow helping me get through a run. Yes, I realize, especially after I type it! But at this point, I have to play a lot of mind games with myself because I am so tired and I have (only!) 2 months left.

Maybe others have similar "games" they play with themselves. Like: Ok, I'll clean the living room during Jack Johnson's "To the Sea." Or I'll wash the car and then get an ice cream cone! I am for whatever works!